.|. COHERENT COMICS UNINCORPORATED ---X------------------------------------------------------------------------- '|` PRESENTS DVANDOM | -. -. -. | ________| ____ \ ,___ \ ____ \ ________| | .' \ | | / ` | | | | | | | / ___| | | | | ` / | | __| | | < | __| | | | ,--- \ \ | | | \ | | \ ` | | | / | \ / | ___| _______-' ___| ____\ -______-' ____________| #45 Writing Chance Part Three - "Born Under A Bad Sign" copyright 1995 by Dave Van Domelen ============================================================================= [cover is homage to the Watchmen cover with the smile-face next to the sewer grate [if it wasn't a cover, then to that panel, okay??] but with the smile-face replaced by an LNH insignia and the blood replaced by Sig.Lad oozing into the sewer.] ============================================================================= "...now that I think about it..." mused Dr. Dan "Sinful" Amick-Tention, the slightest trace of worry flitting across his brow. Before he could think any more about it, Kopikat suddenly grew to full size and hurled herself across the other three, flattening out into a metallic blanket. "DOWN!" she shouted, just as a bomb that had been slipped under the door exploded! The bomb had little concussive force, but what it lacked in boom it more than made up in burn, and the incendiary device soon had the volatile chemicals in the lab burning like a furnace. Styrofoam blobs swelled up suddenly and just as quickly caught fire and burned like marshmallows. The roof was slowly being lifted off its supports by the swelling chemicals, and the thick black smoke made excellent cover for Kopikat as she burst through the wall with her less fire-retardant companions. [Editor's note: if you think the quick rewrite giving Kat time to respond to the bomb before it exploded is cheesy, just remember what genre we're in right now, eh? Happened all the time in the serials.] "Curse me for a fool," coughed Sinful as he got out of the oily smoke. "For months I trusted Jerry...I never realized he could be a Nazi spy." A normally faint scar on his upper lip flared red with the only sign of fury the giant ever showed. To lose all that work at the hands of a supposed ally rankled him more than a little. "No," interjected Squidman, "curse *me* for an amateur. I forgot we were crossing genre boundaries, and I was caught unawares. Nazi villains in this era are always ugly and have cheap accents, but despite this the heroes don't pick up on it until it's Too Late (TM). If Kat hadn't made the connection she did in time to start scanning for trouble, we'd have been very badly burnt, if not killed." "In any case, it would be best to leave the area for the time being. We'll only get in the way of the firefighters, and if the Nazis think I'm dead for even a while I can get some work done in true secrecy," Sinful pointed out. "Now, I suppose as thanks for saving my life, the least I can do is help you out with your problem, Mr....?" "You can call me Sig.Lad. But what about all the notes and research you just lost? Can you reproduce them?" Dan chuckled. "I may not be active with the Institute at the moment, but I *do* keep in touch with the others. And as a precaution against this sort of thing, I showed my results to Nick Naime a few days ago...the other time traveler got me worried, you see. If he had to come back to this time to get the information, it implied the data would be lost. So, while Nick may not understand the data, he has it all. A quick phone call and I can reproduce my recent results...." * * * * A lone figure stepped out of the shadows of the Hero District in Sig.Ago. He didn't know his own name, nor exactly why he was there, but he did know he had to find Sig.Lad before it was too late. Something horribly wrong was going to happen, something that would affect billions of lives...what *was* it? He slumped against the wall in frustration. So important, yet he couldn't remember. He quickly searched his clothing, hoping he had some kind of note or identification on him that might suggest why he was there. "John Q. Smith, 4201 South Nettersly Drive, Sig.Ago." The face on the driver's license was nondescript and haggard-looking, as most license pictures were, even where he came from. "Where I came from?" he muttered. Why had he thought that? Wasn't he from here? Why couldn't he remember? He certainly hadn't been mugged, he still had the wallet, so a blow to the head wasn't likely. Besides, his head didn't hurt. Well, aside from a dull fuzzy pain that wouldn't go away, but that wasn't a trauma pain. There was another thing that struck him as odd. He felt certain he shouldn't normally know about things like muggings and trauma, but that he was rare in his knowledge of these things. Yet to judge by the way most passersby ignored him, mustn't muggings at least be common here? He took a step forward and almost fell to the pavement. His body didn't respond the way he thought it should...his legs felt too short, his torso too narrow...everything was wrong! His body fit him no better than his hazy memories did...like it should be his but wasn't really despite...preparations? How and why did one prepare to be in another body? "You okay, mister? Ain' it a bit early in da day ta be tyin' one on, hey?" spoke a voice from behind him. He turned unsteadily to face it, looking as he turned at his reflection in a shop window. He certainly looked normal enough. And what was "tyin' one on?" "Er, yes, just a little dizzy is all. Tie one on?" he asked. "Ya know, tip back a few brews, get hammered...drunk. Y'ain't from round here, are ya?" "No, I'm definitely not." That much he was sure of now. Whatever his possessions may tell him, he certainly wasn't from around here. Drunk? Did people do that anymore? Everything seemed wrong and out of place. "I'm here in town to see Sig.Lad. Could you direct me to him? It's vitally important." "Heh. Yer right at their door, hey?" The young man laughed and pointed at the foyer entrance just down the block before turning around and walking off in a fit of laughter. "Not drunk, shyeah...." He managed to make it to the doorway by bracing one hand against the front of the building. It was like all his limbs were prosthetic or something, the feedback was all wrong. When he pushed open the door he toppled onto the floor and struck his head, blacking out.... * * * * Doctor Stomper finished one last check of the room, making sure nothing remained that could give his new guest any premature hints about his own future. Even something as simple as a postcard with an American Flag stamp had to be hidden...since that would prove the Allies did not lose the war. The computer itself had already been locked down to give away as little as necessary. "All right, Robot Girl, you may release him." "Please, call me Kopikat or Kat," she replied as she unfolded from around "Sinful" Amick-Tention. Sig.Lad had already stepped off the platform of the time.thingy and was hurriedly donning the modified powersuit that could at lease slow down his deterioration. Squidman had taken up a position outside the door to explain why Doctor Stomper was unavailable, should anyone need his services for the next few hours. "Understand, Dr. Amick-Tention, that you must of necessity play a more passive role in this work. I have fed your notes into the computer system, but when I encounter an unclear point or a stumbling block, I will involve you in it," cautioned Doc Stomper. "I know. Should I find out too much, even about the end result of my own work, it could alter my future in...unpleasant ways. Your history says I did not succeed, so I must not find the solution myself in this time and carry it back. Additionally, even the smallest of clues left in your...computer... might tell me too much of my own fate." His tone shifted as if he were talking more to verbalize his thoughts than to communicate them to anyone. "Already you've indirectly told me so much, much more than a man should rightly know about his fate. That I'm even important enough to threaten the future should something happen to me here implies much and places a great weight of responsibility on my shoulders." While Doctor Stomper was already immersed in his calculations, Sig.Lad had the answer that would have been given in any case. "Not really. Even a tiny change can make a great distance when multiplied over the decades. Time may be robust in this Looniverse. It may be able to ignore any of a million paradoxes and minor changes...my very existence is proof of that. But there's a limit to how far it can be abused. We know how drastically reality can be changed when even one person is removed [Editor's Note: See Retcon Midnight, Constellation #30-32 or _It's A Wonderful Life_]. What happens if the one person is...altered...well, let's just say we're not feeling particularly foolhardy with the timestream today. I can't remember who said it, but there's a quote that goes like this: I am a part of all whom I have met. So change one and you change all." "I believe that was James Joyce, or maybe Tennyson, but I've been remiss in my studies of literature of late, I'm sorry to say," sighed the hulking Agent of P.U.L.P. as he sat at one of the swivel chairs in the lab. "War has a way of pushing aside all the higher pursuits of human existence. Even as mechanized and depersonalized as we've made it with our tanks and bombers and the like, it's still as brutal, savage and barbaric as when it was waged with swords and you got the blood of your enemy in your face. I suppose that's the strongest reason I don't wish to know more of this future...I'm afraid war still exists. Afraid it can never be eliminated, that no matter how clever we get we get no wiser." The room was silent for a long moment and after while Sinful could be heard quietly snoring. In repose he looked almost gentle, despite his muscles. Yet there was the quiet threat that he could awaken at a moment's notice, to meet whatever threat might be foolish enough to face him. Sig.Lad decided to let the man of yesterday get his rest, and did not wake him. Kopikat also held her counsel, but it wasn't Sinful she was worrying about.... * * * * Flashing, jumbled images. A secret base buried deep in the roots of the Earth itself. A desperate plan, hazy figures standing at his side operating some kind of machinery. Too late! The vault of basalt overhead lifted away under the power of the tyrant! No time to make final adjustments...must go now! Must stop Sig.Lad from...from.... "What?!?" he cried as he sat up abruptly. His body still felt wrong, his vision still swam, but neither as intensely as it had before. He was in a bedroom...no, an infirmary. Someone must have found him after his collapse. But was he in a hospital, or inside the Dvandom Force base? So little time left...the closer he was to Sig.Lad, the better. The door opened and a figure he somehow recognized as Cheeez Arrow entered the room. "Our guest is awake," the Brie Bowman called out over his shoulder as he stepped over to "John Smith." "Now that you're conscious, do you have any idea why you weren't conscious before? Were you attacked?" John shook his head to try and clear it, but it only made him dizzier. "I...yes. No. I remember being attacked, but I wasn't me. I mean, I wasn't in this body. And it hasn't happened yet...that's why I'm here. To prevent the need for me to come here. I think. My memory's hazy, all I know is that I have to stop Sig.Lad from doing something, or maybe make him do something he wasn't going to do." A woman he knew to be Rotanna entered. "Is he okay, Stan? He looks fevered." "It's...it will pass. I hope," John replied. "I'm certain of one thing, though. If I can't remember my mission and do what I have to do, the future will really, really suck." "Suck?" chuckled Cheeez Arrow. "Hey, my brain feels like it's been worked over by WorldGov thugs, excuse me for not being able to maintain an appropriately melodramatic tone. Whoa..." John fell back into the bed as a major dizzy spell hit. "Y'know, this is one of the times I really wish the LNH had started out with a better tradition of having telepaths around," mused Cheeez Arrow. "This smells like ripped-off X-Men plot, but without the obligatory X-telepath we've got no chance of figuring out if this guy's telling the truth...and if he is, of dredging up that truth. Rotanna, think you can do anything?" The fledgling sorceress-adventurer shrugged. "The mind isn't really my specialty, most of the spells I know confuse rather than clarify. Besides, depending on which X-plot's being ripped off, it might be impossible for even an expert mind-sifter to get anything." John tried to sit up again but was pushed down by Cheeez Arrow's firm hand. He settled for raising his head to face Rotanna. "Please, if it can even take a few moments off the time it takes me to recall what I need to know, that could save the future." Rotanna concentrated for a moment, then spoke in the eerie-sounding Rot-13 cypher she'd learned at her father's knee. "Zrzbevrf orpbzr pyrne!" For just a moment, it was like a movie had come sharply into focus in John's mind, but just as rapidly it blurred again. But in that time he'd gleaned one piece of information. "My mission has to do with...Acton Lord!" Cheeez Arrow and Rotanna exchanged worried glances. For his part, John once again passed out from the strain. * * * * "Well, that's it. Even with Kopikat inputting all her data on medical advances from her time period and helping run the simulations at a faster pace, we've come up empty handed," sighed Doctor Stomper as he slumped back in his chair, tired and frustrated. All problems had answers, but the answer to this one was "No." Sinful stood, looking like the weight of the world was resting upon his broad back. "I suppose this explains why I never continued the research. Fantastic powers for a few years followed by inevitable death might have appealed too much to desperate Allied commanders. If I were to continue this project, the ethical dilemma would certainly not be resolved in a manner to my liking. No, no matter how inevitable an Axis victory might look on the horizon, I will not be party to the creation of suicide troops...the last weapon of a nation that has lost any pretense of humanity. I will not let this particular genie out of the bottle, Sig.Lad. And I'm sorry that I have indirectly caused your demise. May you find a cure, sir...and if not, may your end be dignified." Sinful extended a hand, taking Sig.Lad's armored hand in his own in a firm handshake. "You may send me home, Doctor Stomper." As Dr. Amick-Tention disappeared on the platform of the time.thingy, Sig.Lad felt another nail being driven into his coffin, another grain of sand falling through the hourglass. Another hope turned to dust. Kopikat gently put a hand on his shoulder. "There's still time, R... Sig.Lad. There's still the possibility Acton Lord has a cure...he *is* you, right? And if I...we have to, we'll tear Andale Atoll down to the sea floor to get it from him." "But can I even face him, Kat? With his powers, he could finish me off in an eyeblink now, corrupting my body beyond hope of sustaining life! For all I know, this could be his work in the first place, accelerating a deterioration that wouldn't have happened to me for years or decades." "At least I'll know who to kill," whispered Kat low enough that none in the room could hear.... * * * * [House Ad]===================================================================== .|. COHERENT COMICS UNINCORPORATED ---X------------------------------------------------------------------------- '|` PRESENTS THE ARC THAT WILL BLOW YOU AWAY! XXXX XXXX XXXX XXXX XXXX XXXX XXXX XXXX XXXXXXX ____ ___ ___ _____ XXXX #### |___) | | |___ | XXXXXXX #### | | | | | XXXX XXXX | `___' ___' | XXXX XXXX ____ __ ___ _____ ___ XXX XXXX |__ |_\ | | | | X XXXX | | \ | | | | XXXX | | \ `___ | `___' Starting in Dvandom Force #46 and continuing into #48, this arc tells the story of a future that must not be allowed to happen, a future where everything has gone as wrong as it possibly can. If the devastation of the ASH universe disturbed you, this latest Coherent production will leave you gasping! NOT a disjointed arc tossed in to upset the narrative and cynically improve sales, X-Post Facto will actually advance the plot of Dvandom Force! Danglers from Writing Chance will be wrapped up as the title marches on to its triumphant 48th issue! Coming soon to newsreaders near you. ============================================================================== * * * * "Uh-oh," said Cheeez Arrow with overtones of dread entering his voice. "What?" "Check out that House Ad, Rotanna. I think I know what X-plot we're about to rip off." "I wish you wouldn't look at the ads like that, Stanley, it's creepy." "I know...it took me a while to get used to myself. But the information's certainly important enough to override any discomfort I might have over breaking the fourth wall." "I agree," agreed Squidman as he and the others entered the lobby where Cheeez Arrow and Rotanna were talking. "But the author wouldn't let us see it if he thought we had a chance of derailing his schedule and stopping the arc from happening." Kopikat stomped her foot, making the floor shake a little. "Okay, I've been going along with this author stuff long enough. There's no way the author's some omnipotent being capable of totally shaping our lives. The connection works both ways, right Sig.Lad?" "I used to think so, but...." "I still do, damn it. There's got to be a way to get out of this plotline with our lives and future intact. Anyone know the details of the plot the author's supposedly trying to parody?" Squidman thought for a second. "Well, if he's *just* ripping off the Alter-X plotline in the X-books, I'd guess someone's come back in time to kill Acton Lord, but will kill Sig.Lad instead, thus creating a horrible dystopia in the future where net.heroes are hounded and all that mutant angst stuff. But if he were ripping it off strictly, something wrong should have happened while *we* were back in time...and it hasn't. So that's probably out." "Um, not necessarily. We have a guest in the infirmary who may be from another time, come to prevent Sig.Lad from either doing or not doing something, and Acton Lord's involved," summarized Rotanna. In unison, everyone in the room said "Uh-oh...." Sig.Lad then turned and fixed Rotanna with a glare that looked like it could break his faceplate, it was so intense. "Has he given any other information?" "Um...no. And it took a spell to clear his memory enough to get the fact that Acton Lord was even involved out of him." Rotanna stepped back a pace, afraid for the first time *of* her leader, instead of *for* him. "Well, let's go visit him and see if anything else has come back to him, shall we?" suggested Sig.Lad. * * * * "Mr. Smith?" started Sig.Lad, applying gentle pressure [a recommended safety technique when approaching anyone who might become dangerous if startled. - Ed.] as he looked at the driver's license photo in his other hand. "Whu...Sig.Lad! Thank the Source I've found you in time! But...DAMN it all! I can't remember what I'm in time to prevent!" "Calm down and try to concentrate. Are your memories getting any clearer?" Sig.Lad held himself in tight self-control...as panicked and uncertain as he may have felt inside, this was not the time to run roughshod over a man who could hold the key to the future. Time enough for that later if he proved to be an assassin, Sig.Lad mused darkly. "A little, but it's still...wait, Kopikat! Of course! It took seeing her to jog the memory, but I'm certain my mission has to do with her curing you. I wish I could remember where Acton Lord fits into this, though." John slumped back in frustration. "Kat...?" Sig.Lad asked as he turned to the robot from the future. "You know how to cure me?" Kopikat turned from his gaze and lowered her head in shame. "I... suspected from the moment 'Joe' finished his weird poem, but I couldn't be sure...." "'It means what it isn't,'" interjected Squidman. "The last line had to do with ignoring nanomachines...is that it, Kopikat? Was he telling you not to ignore them?" "Maybe. And the data I was processing for Doctor Stomper and Doctor Amick-Tention also hinted at it. But I didn't want to believe it." Sig.Lad's face twisted in rage for a moment, then fell like a souffle. He sighed. "You knew a cure but didn't want it to work. Was that your mission all along, from the moment you arrived in the Looniverse via Acton Lord's dimensional gate? To get close to me and destroy me, opening the way for Acton Lord to conquer the world?" "NO! It's not like that at all!" Her eyes narrowed and she started to mutter, half to herself. "Could this be his revenge for trying to turn Green Trenchcoat from his service? To force me to relive that day? But how could he know...unless the MACErs told him...." Kat sat down and swelled up to twice human size, bringing all of her mind out of storage as she concentrated. Then she sighed. "I suppose it'll all have to come out now anyway. If this *is* Acton Lord's doing, he's certainly gotten his revenge on me for anything I may have done to him, the bastard. You may have noticed that while other RoboMACs can change into multiple forms, none of them have the versatility I do. They have two, maybe more set forms they can swap between, while I'm fluid and can assume any shape I want...but I can only use many of my systems in one of my two 'set' forms. There's a reason why I can do this and no one else can. "It happened about forty years ago my time. I was a good little Guardian, one of the Scanned humans operating a Robo in service of humanity. Then a plague of nanomachines was unleashed by MACE in a dual assault on humans and on Guardians...the machines mutated the humans, but destroyed any RoboMACs they cam in contact with. I was infected, but survived, incorporating the nanomachines into myself to rebuild my body at will. [A rather dry summary of the last section of the Kopikat One-Shot. - Ed] But the original 'mission' of the nanovirus is still there, buried under my programming. And I could infect Sig.Lad with it and try to use it to give him control over his form. But it could kill him as well...it was designed with normal humans in mind, not ones with Super Molder Serum in them." "I'll die anyway without a cure...what was so horrible about this that you couldn't even mention it to me?" demanded Sig.Lad. "DAMN IT, do I HAVE to tell you? Isn't it enough I've been forced to THINK about it, do I have to TALK about it too??" she screamed. "FINE. Here's my secret shame, the reason I could never go back to a 'normal' life with the Guardians. I wasn't just infected by some random human victim, I was infected by the last one left standing after my oh-so-enlightened superiors had slaughtered thousands of victims. I got back from a wild goose chase we Scans had been sent on only to see a charnelhouse. And it gets better...oh yeah, MUCH better. The man who infected me was Ray Davis, an old friend of mine from when I'd been human...and the only man to ever truly love me. And I didn't even know he did until after his body'd been reduced to atomic ash...the last thing he did was break the programming of the virus and save my life. And I've carried the memory of his last words with me for FORTY YEARS, never letting myself forget how even the 'Good Guys' can turn into monsters...never letting myself forget that Ray found what I gave up forever in exchange for a metal body...humanity." The room was silent save for Kopikat's sobbing. Sig.Lad was the first to speak. "I...I wish I could say he wasn't the only one, but I can't. It would help make up for the pain of those memories, maybe, but it would be a lie...you're my friend, Kat. But I don't love you." "I know," she replied, wiping a metallic tear from her face. "As I told the Green Trenchcoat, I'm pretty good at reading people." "Then you know I'm willing to take the risk. The nanovirus claimed so many lives...maybe for once it could save one? PLEASE, Kat." "But I'm not willing to risk you turning into a mindless monster bent on destroying all Guardians." John Smith cleared his throat. "For what it's worth, I'm pretty sure that it won't...that this is the cure you're *supposed* to find." "Are you confident in this?" asked Squidman. "No. There's something nagging at the back of my mind, something that tells me it went horribly wrong in my past...wait. Another bit's floating to the surface of my memory. Something about Acton Lord again. How not getting cured made him what he is." "Maybe he thought Kat's painful memories would keep her from curing me? That would mean I'd turn into him...only your arrival prevented that by telling Kat it would work," pondered Sig.Lad. "Careful," warned Squidman. "The author's already planned an arc around this failing...the solution can't be that easy." "Maybe it can. Maybe he's trusting my paranoia about Acton Lord to make me abandon the only hope I have, thinking it to be one of his tricks. We can't keep second guessing until I collapse into a puddle of goo, Squidman...then he wins for sure. Kat, let's do it. Besides," he grinned, for the first time in days, "if this fails we have three issues to fix it in." "Okay...let's go out into the lobby so I can grow to full size and enclose you. I don't want to risk letting any nanoviruses out to rampage uncontrolled." The team left the infirmary, with Kid Macro supporting John Smith (and carrying a spear) as they walked. Kat grew to full size and flowed over Sig.Lad, enveloping him completely in a splash page rife with sexual subtext as a shocked look of revelation sharted to spread across John Smith's face. "Initiating infection...now." John lurched away from Kid Macro, a look of horror on his face. "I remember! The plotdevicium...you had to get him out of the armor first!" Kopikat turned around and desperately tried to stop the process, but a look of pain started to replace her surprise. She buckled and shrank, collapsing in upon herself in a blazing glare. The glare increased until no one could see.... And then the top floors of the building exploded outwards. When the debris cleared, a lone figure stood on the wreckage, smiling insanely. It was Sig.Lad, a metallic cast to his features and a green glow coming from his eyes. "Now I know..." he whispered to the air, then took to the air and was over the horizon in an instant. ============================================================================ NEXT ISSUE: 2077 X-POST FACTO! ============================================================================ Author's Notes This is one of the few issues I've written recently without any sort of outline prepared in advance. In fact, there were several places in the story I was stuck on how to get to the end (which I did have planned out) in such a way that A: seemed reasonable and B: took 25K or more. Since it was written in pieces over several days, the tone may be inconsistent...and since most of it was written after my infamous "I Hate April Fool's Day" post, the tone gets very dark in places. #46-48 will be set in a possible future growing out of the events of this issue, and will be crosspost to alt.toys.transformers for reasons I don't want to give away just yet. I have no plans to invite other authors to be part of this event, however...especially since all their characters get killed off, oh, about thirteen minutes or less after the final scene of this issue. Armageddon 2001 ref, y'see. And this time there's no ambiguity who gets to be Monarch, yes?