Things you shouldn't say at your dissertation defense  SOPER logo
Mind a last minute topic change? Sloppiness is intentional, ironic. Theory was current when I started 12 years ago.
Minimalist dissertation on minimalism, get it? 50% on book royalties if you approve now. What was the name of the subject of my study?
Out of money and light, last 62 pages in blood by candlelight. That my Mom loves is what really counts. Against weak chapter 3, do you like sage-green textured paper?
Not plagiarized! See tiny quotes at start and end? Pages are warped 'cause I sweat a lot. Interpretive dance will communicate trashed draft.

Kerry Soper is an assistant professor of humanities, classics,
and comparative literature at Brigham Young University.

Copyright © 2000
The Chronicle of Higher Education
July 7, 2000
Section: Opinion
Page: B11

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What not to say at your Dissertation Defense
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